I believe "Life, a Funny Thing" is a quote from Leon Spinks. Either that or I am making that up. I want to believe that I have great faith. I know there is a GOD and believe that He is in control of all things and He has a purpose for all things. I know this in my head. This is a week that I am having a hard time with it in my heart. There, I said it. I am human and I am confused. My friend Melissa was diagnosed with Stage 3 ovarian cancer yesterday. Is she any different than anyone else? No, not really. She is my friend, she is a Christian, she is a mother, she is a wife, she is a daughter, she is a sister, she is a daughter in law, she is a woman. So no, I guess that she really isn't different than any other women who face this. She just happens to be the person that I know that has it and therefore it has become more real. I can't help but think that life just goes along and then one day your are faced with a tragic situation. A disease, a death, a life altering moment that changes you forever. I have been blessed that I have not faced that many things in my life. The sudden death of my father has been the most difficult thing I have faced. But when you see your friend, (10 years younger than me) who is such a good person suddenly faced with this it humbles you and makes you realize that is could just as easily be me or you for that matter. There are no guarantees. Like Leon said "life, a funny thing." So over the last few days I have questioned myself. It's the classic why do bad things happen to good people scenario. I don't understand and I am not sure that I ever will. But I have to believe that good will come from this and that people will be touched. I have to believe that Melissa will be healed and that her faith will affect others. It has me. Do I still question why this is happening? You bet. Do I still think it is totally unfair? You bet. But life isn't fair and bad things do happen to good people. But God is good. He has a plan and He will be glorified by this. I have to believe that because I don't want to believe anything else. I just need my head to tell my heart and let's all get on board. When you pray, please lift Melissa and her family up in your prayers. They are great people and are going through so much right now. I know they would appreciate your prayers.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
I am not complaining because I am so thankful for doctors and hospitals and insurance....but I am so over spending the last 2 days going to doctor's offices. Emma had her 4 year old check up yesterday, albeit a little late. She did great until they had to prick her finger for blood and until Dr. H looked in her ears. It all went south then. I want to say that we have the best pediatrician that you could ask for. He has a gift of kindness and his love for all things international adoption is such a benefit to us. Needless to say, Emma is an interesting case and he is always mesmerized by her. The funniest thing he asked yesterday was "What are you doing about shoes?" I politely told him that shoes are a pain in the rear and he agreed. Tennis shoes and boots, no problems. Sandals and church shoes...problem. It's trial and error. When we find a shoe that works, we stock up. His biggest concern is Emma's speech delay and he agreed that we are doing just about everything we can to address that. After asking how many doctors are involved in her care, 5 total, he just wanted to know how he could help me personally. I just thought that was a sweet question to ask and I know that he really means it. Now he didn't offer to babysit or anything, so I'm not saying he is perfect, but he is a great guy. Emma was 36 pounds and 40 3/4" tall. Luckily she didn't require any shots, only a little blood work. Everything looked okay and we addressed this whole pooping problem. He reassured me that she is normal and to introduce a little Miralax into her routine and help her to understand that she has to poop in the bathroom even if she has on her diaper. That will be a hit. Today we had our FOURTH hearing exam and it was finally determined that indeed she does need to have a sedative ABR and that was scheduled. OH JOY. She actually did well during the first part of her exam but when the Audiologist broke out the otoscope things quickly turned ugly. We finally finished up with that portion and then had to head over to the surgery center to have a quick "physical"....right....and get our arrangements made. Unfortunately they couldn't get her scheduled until May. So that is our next big hurdle and I'm sure that it will go well. Luckily nothing was said about having to have any lab work done and I was very happy about that. I had already decided to decline it because it's not necessary. I was glad we didn't have to cross that bridge. The most annoying part of our appointment this morning was the continuous text messages that I was receiving from Ashton who wanted me to bring him lunch today because they were only serving sack lunches today due to ACT testing. This kid is so annoying and only thinks about food and girls. So while I was holding my sweet screaming girl my not so sweet boy was in constant text mode. Granted, I was 45 minutes away from him and somehow he just thought I could magically make his lunch request appear. My desire to strangle him had never been stronger...... The highlight of Emma's day was "riding da bus please". She was watching the shuttle outside of the window and was thrilled when we got to ride it from one facility to another. She is crazy about buses and thought she was such a big girl when she got to ride one today. The driver played the Caddyshack song while we were on there and Emma was wide eyed and so excited.
Friday, March 25, 2011
My sweet little girl has copped a 4 year old attitude. I had seen it coming but it has now arrived in full force.
On Monday I considered beating her while at gymnastics because she refused to participate. Bo's explanation was that perhaps she didn't understand the instructions.....She understood the instructions and has been in the class longer than anyone else. She didn't want to follow the instructions because she, well, because she didn't want to.
On Tuesday my face hurt from laughing at her and the other kids while at soccer. Most of the kids are paying a little attention to the coach. Emma however discovered that she has a shadow and it follows her everywhere she goes and if she prisses and twists her bottom, that really cracks her up. I told the coach she might need to practice in the dark if he wants to get anything out of her. At least she didn't pull her pants down to go potty like one of the boys on the team. Do you understand why my cheeks were hurting?
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Emma has a cough and stuffy nose thing going on right now and was up at 3 for a little momma time. It's amazing how your mind works sometimes and the thoughts that just randomly enter your head. While rocking Emma and then when I made it back to bed, my thoughts were just all over the place. These included, but were not limited to.....
- I wonder who my kids will marry someday and at that moment I said several prayers that my kids would find a Christian mate that loved God first and them second. As Brady approaches 18 in the next year, this thought enters my head more often.
- I really need to study for ACLS. My class is next week.
- I thought a lot about the Japanese and how they seem to be handling a disaster with such a sense of calm and how that compares with the United States.
- I wish we had new carpet in the bedrooms.
- I wonder if Emma's birth parents have the same type of personality that Emma has or is it just environmental.
- Did I put orange juice on the grocery list?
- I sure would like new counter tops and a new kitchen sink.
- Will I ever learn to do digital scrap booking?
- What will Brady make on the ACT?
- Should I take Emma to the doctor or is this just a cold?
- Are most insects necessary?
So as you can see, I suffer from flight of ideas.
My stepfather works puzzles all the time. I uploaded some pics for my mom yesterday and I loved this one. Emma may or may not have taken a few pieces of pap's puzzle......I'm just saying.
Monday, March 14, 2011
The first day of spring break and I have already had to tie Emma to the cabinet:)
Not really. She has been a "dog" all afternoon and wanted me to put her leash on and walk her around the house and then tie her to the cabinet. Don't worry, the "leash" is tied to her strap and not her neck! I save that for the boys.
Saturday, March 12, 2011
3 kids. That is what God has blessed us with. 2 the old fashioned way and 1 through the miracle of adoption.
I love my 3 kids. They are all unique. Totally Different. Their personalities, their physical traits, the whole package.
Ashton. My athlete. My kid who wants to fit in and be popular. My kid who doesn't reveal his feelings as well but will come into my room at night and lay down next to me and pretend like nothing is bothering him. After a few minutes his shield begins to come down a little and I can usually find out what is going on in that head/heart of his.
He doesn't show his feelings very well and heaven forbid that he ever tells you he is sorry for something. He will stand there and give me that look that says "OK, I will say it, but only because you are making me." Of all my kids, he is the most like me. The good, the bad, and the ugly. Well, he ain't ugly. He's actually a very handsome boy. I knew when he was born and the nurse pointed out those dimples right away that I would have trouble.
He is on top of his game most of the time. He wants to do well and make good grades. He has very little patience (another trait of mine). He is tender hearted in a lot of ways and last year after church camp when he mentioned that $20 will buy food, shelter, water, and school supplies for children in India and he had tears in his eyes, I had one of those moments that my heart was bursting with pride. He had donated his money and didn't have any for food on the trip home. For this boy to sacrifice food says a lot about him. He is a good boy and I love him so much.
That is not to say that he drives me nuts every morning when I am trying to get him out of the bed. He is also very demanding at times.
BRADY. Oh dear Brady.....Words are hard to find.
Emma. She is work in progress and I love seeing her personality shine through. She is so funny. Trying at times, yes. I think a lot of that will get better as her speech emerges. I look so forward to the day that she can speak clearly. I know it's frustrating for her and there are days when it is very frustrating for me as well.
Friday, March 4, 2011
Yesterday was our first soccer practice and let me just say, 4 year olds have the attention span of a flea. They were hilarious and adorable to watch. They are the "Purple Crush" and I can't wait to see these crushers in action.
After driving all over town and finally finding cleats, shin guards, a ball, shorts and socks, we are officially ready to start the season.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
My absolute favorite flower is a Daffodil (better known in the county as Buttercups:). It's a sure sign of spring.