Miss Cranky Pants

My sweet baby girl is not so sweet right now. We have had no more vomiting, however when you have only eaten 10 goldfish crackers and a few sips of juice vomiting really shouldn't be an issue. She has taken a few bites of various other things but has had no appetite for 2 days now. She slept great last night and hasn't had any fever, she is just not herself. It's so frustrating when they can't tell you what is bothering them. I also think I am beginning to see a bit of her 2 year old stage coming to life. She through herself on the rug last night and banged her head on purpose. What was that all about? This girl has a stubborn streak about her as well and although I am sure that will bode well for her in the future it's not so pretty when I'm the one on the receiving end!

The boys have gone to church for game night and Bo is with 2 of his life long friends watching football and eating chips. Emma and I are hanging out on New Year's Eve until they get back home. Oh I remember the days of partying with friends and staying up all night. If I make it to 9 p.m. I will be proud of myself. Amazing how having kids and getting older changes your life. No more late nights for me.

For some reason I kept waking up last night thinking about my kids and how it all began and how completely green we were when we started out. Let's face it, no one is really prepared to become a parent. No amount of books or episodes of Supernanny can prepare you for the unknown abyss that is parenting. It's a crap shoot. I look at my kids and wonder how they will turn out and thank God that so far they are healthy and happy. Well, as happy as teenagers and preteens can be. Emma doesn't qualify in that group yet.

I remember being so freaked out about being pregnant the first time. After the shock wore off and the days began clicking along I enjoyed being pregnant. I was one of the lucky ones. Never vomited one day, thank God. I felt good and didn't gain a ton of weight. Pregnancy was wonderful. I was also determined that I would do it all the right way. Natural delivery all the way for me. Lamaze classes here we come. We attended our classes regularly preparing for our little bundle of joy. After seeing my doctor for a regular visit it was determined that I was dilated to a 3 and I could go at anytime. I loved my doctor. I think he provided all of his patients with false hope, but I still loved him. I attended my next Lamaze class knowing that it would no doubt be the last. We would be graduating head of the class and leaving everyone else behind. Oh if I had only known I wouldn't have been so smug. We attended all of our classes and I believe graduated at the bottom. Our little darling had no desire to emerge from his happy surroundings and therefore was evicted by a landlord resembling a plastic knitting needle and a suction cup. I did manage to Lamaze and I did have natural childbirth, but after 12 hours of deep cleansing breathing I would have cut him out myself if I could have reached a scalpel. With all of that said, my little boy made his entrance into the cold, cruel world and I revealed a side of myself that I am not proud of. I think my doctor was paid extra for the venom that I spewed and if he wasn't, well at least he had the privilege of delivering our next bundle of joy 2 years later. Another story for another day.

So I guess to conclude this rather strange entry, parenting is not for the faint of heart. As we begin a new year with our boys and our new daughter, I hope that I can improve in so many ways. I don't make resolutions because they never seem to work out. I just have my own personal goals that I ask God to help me with everyday. I want to be mom that my kids can look back on and know that they were prayed for and loved and appreciated for their personalities. That is hard sometimes. But each of them is unique and I'm thankful for them and the husband that God has blessed me with to raise these little hooligans. It's a one shot deal and I want to do it right. I can only do that by the grace of God.

Happy New Year!

Another First - It Ain't Pretty

The first night in her room turned into her first morning with a yucky bed of throw up. Sorry for the bluntness. She went to bed without any difficulty and slept all night. I listened to her on the monitor and never heard a peep except at her usual 6:45 when I heard her whine just a bit. When I went in to get her she was covered in throw up and looking pretty pitiful. I don't know if she has a little virus or if it's related to her ears which she has been pulling at a lot. She hasn't wanted anything to eat this morning and has only taken a few sips of juice. No fever to speak of, but very cranky. That is so not like her. So the first night in her room wasn't exactly like I had hoped. Hopefully this is just a little bug and it's on the way out.

So once again we had to reschedule her apt. with the therapist. Hopefully next week we can get her started. She is currently entertaining herself by playing with an old computer keyboard while I type. I'm hoping she will take a long nap and wake up feeling better.

Ashton has gone to play golf with his team and Brady is still in the man cave. I checked on him at 2 a.m. and he was still awake. I'm sure he will appear after noon looking for food.

So our day has no real plan especially since Emma isn't feeling well. I hope everyone else has a great day.

Another First

Okay, so I am a little sad. My girl has officially moved into her own room and will spend the night there (we hope:) She has been with us every night since Sept. 1 (except for the nights I have worked) and I have to admit I really didn't want to move her into another room. It was time and she will be fine. It's me that I am worried about.

Emma has her first official working visit with the Early Intervention therapist tomorrow. I am anxious to see how that goes. She is doing so well. She is trying so hard to walk! She gets so excited while walking behind her little shopping cart. She gets so excited that she tries to go too fast and down she goes. She's pretty funny to watch.

Not a lot going on today. I have spent the last 2 days catching up laundry, cleaning, putting decorations away, etc. Bo cleaned Emma's carpet today, but the stains were too much. I am going to have to call a professional. Bo moved her crib and furniture into the room and has been busy arranging things just so in her room. He may be worse than a woman. He even took the time to hang all of her hair bows on a long ribbon that her Aunt Jamie gave her for hair bows. Yes, he is worse than most women I know.

So I guess that wraps it up for today. Now that I have my room back I suppose that I should go read. I am very behind and have missed it terribly. No excuses now, so off to bed I go.

Christmas Morning 2008

This hat goes with an adorable dress that Aunt Pam gave Emma for Christmas. I can't wait for her to wear it. We had to take several pictures to get this one and isn't it the cutest smile you have ever seen!
Presents at Giggee and Pop's house!
Emma and Pop.

Brady is all smiles on Christmas morning. Brady and Emma are pretty good buddies.

Emma and Aunt Pam waiting on breakfast.

Okay, so she had the cutest Christmas pajamas to wear in her pictures. Of course, she woke up soaked Christmas morning and therefore no cute p.j. pictures. She actually got this little princess ride on for a baby shower but was to little to ride on it. We held out until Christmas to give it to her and she has mastered it.

Brady isn't the only one around here who loves a guitar.

Helping Bubba with his guitar. "Hey Bubba, Freebird please".

Ashton has at long last gotten his beloved cell phone. I have a feeling he will have tendinitis in his thumbs before long.

Emma is getting into the action.

My sweet kids!

My nephew Ben and his girlfriend Ashley.

A Few More Pics

Giggee, Brady and Emma lighting the candles. Teaching a toddler to play with fire:)

Nanny and Pap with some of their handsome grandchildren. That little girl really prettys the family up.

Ashton was helping Emma with her book.

Christmas Pics - More to Come

Christmas Eve at Nanny and Pap's house. Emma doesn't stand a chance with all boy cousins! Ben was putting the bow on and she was taking it off.

Emma and Uncle Jimmy McGowan. They kept trying to put the cowboy hat on Emma but she was having none of it.

Jay walking with cousin Jay at Giggee and Pop's house.

Notice the fat lip. Another episode of falling over and hitting her lip.

Aunt Jamie and Emma.

Ready for church in my pretty dress. Does this child look excited or what? She reminds me of pictures of my brother before church when we were little.

Josh and Jessie at Nanny and Pap's house.

Nanny and Pap with Josh and Jessie.

Emma survived Christmas festivities like a champ. She wasn't all that interested in the packages, but Brady got a new guitar that she loved. This girl has a musical gene! Just like most families, we have several places to go during the holidays. We started out at Bo's parents on Christmas Eve celebrating with his extended family. We then head to my mom's house for Christmas with my brother and family. Christmas morning we spend at home for a little while opening presents and then head again to Bo's parents house for Christmas with them. Very busy, so Emma was pretty tired out. She managed to go to bed at 10 p.m. on Christmas Eve and was up at 6:45 on Christmas morning. She is certainly off schedule. The boys were up way before her and had to endure the wait.

I will have a lot more pictures, but I have dial up and it takes 10 minutes to load each picture. Can you say pain?

Christmas Eve

As I attempt to type this post while my little girl sits at my feet playing with an empty photo album and address stickers (she's easily entertained), I can't believe what a year we have had. When I reflect back on the last few months, starting in January when we made the decision to go special needs, to April when we got a call about a little girl that we knew God didn't plan on us adopting, to June 13 when we got the call about Emma and all the things that have happened from that day forward, I am in awe of it all. Our lives have changed drastically and my heart is beyond full. When I look into her little eyes and see how happy she is and how happy she makes our family, it just overflows and of course, falls down my cheeks. She is our daughter that God planned on us having long before we knew what that plan was. Never say what you will and won't do, because God may just surprise you and you may have to eat those words.

While I waited for Bo to complete his procedures yesterday (and he is doing well), a lady in the waiting area was talking to everyone else in the waiting area. She was very nice and very chatty. When we began talking, she asked how many kids I had and their ages. When I mentioned that we had a daughter that was 22 months old, she asked all the details. I told her about our adoption experience and mentioned that Emma was missing some fingers and toes and she immediately began praising me for taking on such a huge responsibility. I hate that. I attempted to explain that we were the ones being blessed by this little girl and that she was quite able to do things for herself and very determined, even at such a young age. I didn't get the opportunity to witness as much as I would have liked, but I did get to talk a little about my favorite topics, adoption and my kids.

Did I ever suspect that we would adopt a special needs child? No. I had plans on adopting a healthy, perfect "China doll" (a name I have come to hate). God had other plans for us. Yes, she is healthy and beautiful, but in the eyes of the world, she is handicapped. We don't see it. We see her. The very determined little girl who loves to play her drums and guitar, hold a granola bar package in her mouth and shake it like a dog, play with her tractor that she carries in her Dora purse, and wakes up every morning with the sweetest smile that could melt Scrooge's heart. She is perfect in God's eyes and in ours as well. So she may not be exactly what I had planned, but she is certainly what God had planned for our family. She is ours, but more importantly, she is His and I thank Him for allowing us to raise her.

So when I reflect back on this year and thank God for all of His blessings, I am not just saying it, I am meaning it. There have been times when that wasn't the case. God brought us our daughter, he let us travel thousands of miles away and brought us home safely. He kept this little girl in His hands while she waited for her forever family. There are so many other little ones and older ones alike right now that need forever families. I wish we could adopt again, but I don't see that happening right now. If God called us to do that and provided the means, we would certainly follow His will. But if you are reading this post and have the slightest inclination that God has plans for you to adopt, then pray about it and pray some more. If it is His will, then you have to follow it. We did and it has been the most amazing year.

Merry Christmas to everyone. I pray that you and yours have a wonderful Christmas and take time to remember the real reason. That night in Bethlehem led to that day on the cross and the ultimate gift. That is what Christmas is all about and is so often overlooked. I am just as guilty of that as everyone else.

And just a side note, that little girl that we got the call about in April, she has been adopted by her forever family and is doing well. They live about an hour away from us and I will get to meet them soon. Is God not absolutely amazing?